Wrong Song

There's a song she sings
Don't know it's words or name
All I know
When I hear it, it causes me pain

Memories come thick and fast
Thoughts of people, places
The past
A history best left behind
A dream, nightmare brought to mind

The hurts, the anger
Loss and pain
A child broken
Left living in shame

It wasn't my fault
I live with the guilt
I shouldn't have earned
I cry in the dark
For the child left burnt

I wash and I scrub
But never get clean
The ones who hurt me
Left me torn at the seams

A drink doesn't help
So I don't bother now
Just walk away, alone
Take time to dwell

A smart remark
Breaks into my thoughts
Helps set me loose
From the shambles in my mind

I never hear the words
Of the song you sing
Just the memories it triggers
That race to the front
A mind full of darkness
Shadows and ghosts
Do you know
As a child
What I wished for the most
To not be me

Even now
When I hear the opening chords
Just of that song
I still wish
It hadn't been me